Graygender, also sometimes spelled as greygender, and sometimes referred to as gray agender or grey agender, is a gender identity that describes a feeling of ambivalence towards one's gender. It can also be defined as an identity in which a person feels a weak connection to gender in general.[1][2][3][4][5]


The use of "gray-" in graygender is intended to be similar to the use of the suffix for graysexual. Instead of feeling a weak attraction as with graysexual, a person who is graygender would instead feel a weak connection to gender.[1]



The term graygender was first coined by Tumblr user invernom, on March 20th, 2014.[1]


The flag for this identity was designed by Pride-Flags on DeviantArt, on August 23, 2015.[6] The meanings for the graygender flag's colors are as follows:

  • Grey: Spectrum of experiences under this identity[6]
  • Blue: Graygender as an identity and experience, comparing it to deep ocean waters[6]
  • White: Purity and validity of graygender people and their unique experiences[6]



Main article: Agender

Agender can sometimes be confused with graygender, but they are distinct in their own ways. Agender is typically defined as having no gender at all. Graygender is about having a weak connection to gender, or otherwise not caring about one's own gender.[4]


Main article: Asexual spectrum#Graysexual

Both graygender and graysexual share the same prefix, but they are two different types of terms. Graysexual is a sexual orientation, in comparison to greygender which is a gender identity. A graysexual person is someone who experiences a very weak sense of sexual attraction, or may only feel it on very rare occasions.[4]


Main article: Aromantic spectrum#Grayromantic

Similar to the difference between graygender and graysexual, grayromantic is a romantic orientation instead of a gender like graygender. It simply shares the same prefix as graygender and graysexual, and is defined as a weak or rare sense of romantic attraction.[4]


  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 invernom: "Identifying As “Graygender”/“Greygender”". (Archived version). (Archived on January 23, 2022).
  2. "68 Terms That Describe Gender Identity and Expression".
  3. "The Gender Identification Flags You Should Know About For Pride Season!" (May 24, 2019). The LGBT Sentinel.
  4. 4.0 4.1 4.2 4.3 Hardell, Ash. The ABC's of LGBT+. Mango Media Inc., 2016. ISBN 9781633534087.
  5. Ash Hardell: "What is Greygender?" (Video) (Dec 17, 2016).
  6. 6.0 6.1 6.2 6.3 Pride-Flags: "Graygender / Gray Agender". (Archived version). (Archived on January 27, 2022).